Have you seen Inside Out? You know the part (OK, I’m just gonna assume you’ve seen it) when the dad’s little emotional dudes have to put (gasp) … the foot down? (“Sir, reporting high levels of sass!”)

It didn’t go so well in the movie, but it went well for me the other day when I did it to a client! 😉 And now, it’s this week’s #ClarityGem …





freak out


I know, and coach, a lot of tightly wound people. I myself am such a person sometimes (a lot of the time?).

We — the tightly wound, that is — tend to think that everything is a Big. Freaking. Deal.

Someone didn’t load the dishwasher the way you would? It’s a BIG DEAL, PEOPLE.

Traffic has you running 10 minutes late? UGH, the BIGGEST of DEALS.

Someone was short with you in an email? You don’t know what it means, but you can be assured … it’s a BIG DEAL.

And naturally, when your tendency is to treat everything with a serious, perfectionist, near-crisis level of control and anxiety … your stress is going to be just as BIG as all of your “big deals.”

So, a little while ago I told one of my clients (who was suffering from this affliction) …

“That’s it. From now on, you are allowed ONE ‘big deal’ per day. That’s your quota. You officially have my permission to freak out once daily. No more!”

She came back the next week and told me:

“Whoa … it turns out that when you’re only allowed to freak out once per day, you’ve got to be really careful about what you freak out about.”

My thoughts, exactly.

twitter-bird NEW RULE: You’re only allowed to freak out about *one thing* per day. #ClarityGems

How is this #ClarityGem sitting with you today? Leave us a comment to let us know!


Sometimes it’s just better to avoid long blog posts and cut straight to the point!

Think of #ClarityGems as your weekly shake of the good ‘ole Magic 8 Ball … you never know what might bubble up and how it might be exactly what you need to hear today.

And instead of just a beautiful, inspirational, and shareable image (which is a nice start), we’re giving you some quick thoughts about how to interpret it … because inspiration without action is pretty, but kind of anti-climatic.

Tweet it, share it on Instagram, or forward it along to someone who needs to hear it today … and tag us (@ClarityonFire) to let us know how this Gem is inspiring you!

Much Love,

Rachel (+ Kristen)

4 comments | add a comment | Share this > Tweet this > Email this >
  1. Yes! I love this! This is one of the biggest changes I’ve noticed in myself after the PPVE and going through coaching. I don’t make as big a deal out of things. It’s not that I just accept and agree with everything that comes along. I certainly get triggered and annoyed from time to time. But, I’m better equipped now to accept that whatever the setback, it’s temporary and not as serious as l originally thought. This makes so much more space for creativity and happiness.

    1. So glad this has gotten easier for you! The part about having more space for creativity and happiness is SO true. It’s crazy how much mental energy gets eaten up when you’re constantly triggered!

  2. I have a mantra I use when I start getting aggravated or “Freaked Out”, and it really puts things in perspective:
    This is a 1st World Problem!!!

    Really – in the big scheme of things, I tell myself this when I feel I’m being a bit, well, bratty and am complaining or “freaking out” about kind of mundane stupid things. I hope this helps peeps out there.

    1. Totally agree, Amy! I also tend to put my “first world problems” into perspective when I’m freaking out. It definitely helps me scale my worries!

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