How many of you are secretly proud of the fact that you’re a perfectionist? All of that meticulous checking of boxes, pristine polishing of projects, and determination to get things just right has probably paid off for you in the form of praise, raises, and good performance reviews, right?

Well, perfectionism can definitely be a badge of honor … but you might want to think twice about whether it’s the kind of “honor” you want to keep showing off.






We’re in the midst of reading Brene Brown’s #1 New York Times Bestseller Daring Greatly. It’s all about how absolutely critical it is to be vulnerable.

Vulnerability = the courage to really feel your emotions and share them (as opposed to shutting down or thinking your feelings are “weak” or shameful).

When we refuse to be vulnerable, we become numb, angry, bitter, jaded, disconnected, defensive (and the list goes on). As it turns out, perfectionism is just another form of self-defense against feeling vulnerable:

“Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving for excellence. Perfectionism is not about healthy achievement and growth. Perfectionism is a defensive move. It’s the belief that if we do things perfectly and look perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgment and shame. Perfectionism is a 20-ton shield we lug around, thinking it will protect us, when in fact it’s the thing that’s preventing us from being seen. ”

{Gulp.} That means that the real challenge isn’t in continuing to be perfect … it’s in deciding you don’t care if people know you aren’t perfect.

twitter-birdPerfectionism is self-destructive simply because perfection doesn’t exist via @BreneBrown #ClarityGems

So, how are you trying to hide behind the shield of perfectionism?


Use #ClarityGems on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook to share how you’re applying this week’s Gem to your own life, and to see how other people are being inspired.


Sometimes it’s just better to avoid long blog posts and cut straight to the point!

Think of #ClarityGems as your weekly shake of the good ‘ole Magic 8 Ball … you never know what might bubble up, and how it might be exactly what you need to hear today.

And instead of just a beautiful, inspirational, and shareable image (which is a nice start), we’re giving you some quick thoughts about how to apply it to your life … because inspiration without action is pretty, but kind of anti-climatic.

Tweet it, share it on Instagram, or forward it along to someone who needs to hear it today … and tag us (@ClarityonFire) to let us know how this Gem applies to you!

Much Love,

Kristen + Rachel

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