Before we dive into today’s blog, we’ve got a quick reminder for you:

Enrollment for the Passion Plan Virtual Experience (PPVE) is still open! Here are a few important things you’ll want to know about the PPVE:

You can read the full page of details here. We also made a video that answers the top 9 most common questions we get asked about the PPVE.

And now, for the 3rd and final part of the series, What do do when you’re stuck at a crossroads.

 


 

You now know exactly what it feels like to be stuck at a crossroads and what you should STOP doing when you’re in the midst of that confusion and overwhelm … but how do you ultimately get UN-stuck and figure out which direction to choose?

A client of mine, Emma, was recently freaking out about this exact thing. She was facing a HUGE life decision and felt paralyzed by her options.

She told me, “This feels like one of the biggest crossroads in my life so far. I feel like this choice will impact the rest of my entire life.”

Emma had a couple of options in front of her: She could 1) stay at her current job and take a lucrative promotion to a leadership position OR 2) take a job offer across the country to work at a creative, fast-growing startup.

She was trying everything she knew to figure out the “right” decision — gathering as much info as she could about each option, making pro/con lists, and asking her friends and family for their advice. But all she felt was MORE confused. It felt like she was waging an internal battle in her mind, and it was impossible to know which side was winning.

MORE INFO IS NOT WHAT YOU NEED

I told Emma, “What you DON’T need right now is more information, better logic, or more detailed comparison lists. You’re drowning in all of that already! Not to sound too Hallmark-y, but what you really need here is more heart. You’re all up in your brain, and your emotions are getting totally ignored. So what do you ultimately want from either of these options?”

“I just want to feel happy and fulfilled,” she responded.

“You can’t logic your way to happy and fulfilled,” I told her. “You have to feel your way there. So let’s bring your emotions back into the picture.”

Considering your emotions sounds simple enough, but it can be really hard to do in practice. So many of us have learned to lean heavily on logic and practicality, and our emotions tend to get ignored, pushed aside, or numbed.

It’s amazing how often I’ll ask my clients, “How do you feel about that?” and they’ll immediately start to respond with, “Well, I think…”

So how do you check in with your emotions when you’re at a crossroads, trying to figure out which direction to take?

THE HULA HOOP EXERCISE

This is an exercise I took Emma through, and I want you to try it for yourself as I explain it.

First, close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Imagine two (or more, based on how many options you’re considering) hula-hoop sized rings on the ground in front of you. Each ring represents a different possible future reality.

Visualize yourself stepping into the center of Ring #1. For Emma, this was the future potential reality of deciding to stay at her current job and take the promotion. Then ask yourself (or have someone else ask you) a few questions:

Then, step out of Ring #1, take a few more deep breathes, and do the same thing with each of the other rings. When you’re done, jot down any notes about what you saw, how you felt, or any changes you experienced in your body.

After I took Emma through this experience, she instantly felt different — calmer, more certain, full of relief — about her choice.

She told me that, while she was standing in Ring #1 (staying at her current job), she felt tense, like a weight was on her shoulders. But when she stepped into Ring #2 (taking the creative startup job across the country), her entire body felt relaxed and light.

“I can really see myself living by the ocean, working in that creative environment. I can’t explain why, but just feels right,” she said.

twitter-bird Your emotions are constantly giving you valuable feedback, if you take the time to listen.

REMEMBER, YOU CAN’T CHOOSE WRONG

Just because Emma had gotten clear on what she truly wanted, didn’t mean she was suddenly free from doubt and second-guessing. So I reminded her, just like I’m reminding you, that she ultimately couldn’t make a wrong decision.

Is moving across the country the absolute “right” decision for Emma? Who knows! There’s always a chance that the new job could be completely different from what she expected and she might wind up missing home more than she thought. There’s no such thing as risk-free progress and growth in this life.

But even a “wrong” decision just might lead you to exactly the right people, or may be the perfect stepping stone to an amazing new opportunity, or might simply illuminate something important about yourself that you never would have discovered otherwise.

While there are no guarantees that everything will be perfect and amazing on the other side of the crossroads, you can trust that whatever choice you make will lead to an amazing adventure and teach you whatever you’re meant to learn. So in that way, you really can’t choose wrong.

I’d love to hear what crossroads you’re at right now and if the hula hoop exercise helped bring you any clarity. Leave a comment to let me know!

SO WHAT NOW?

This 3-part blog series may have given you the inspiration and tools you needed to get clear on what you want and where you’re headed. But if you’re still feeling stuck at a crossroads and unsure how to move forward, it may be because you’re needing a deeper awareness of who you are and what you want out of life. It’s almost impossible to make quality decisions for yourself if you don’t know what will make you deeply happy and fulfilled.

That’s exactly what we’re helping a group of people discover in our Passion Plan Virtual Experience program, which is meant to help you figure out your passion and what you’re meant to do with your life in 30 days or less. Enrollment for the PPVE is only open for one more week, so if you’re considering joining us, you can read more about it and sign up here.

TOO LONG, DIDN’T READ? LISTEN INSTEAD!

If reading long blogs just isn’t your deal, you’re in luck:

We’re now recording our blogs for you!

Here’s Kristen reading this week’s blog:

Much Love,

Kristen (+ Rachel)

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