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So … I was in a therapy session and my therapist said something that filled me with, as I told Kristen during this episode, “The wrath of hell.”
Why? Because she, unintentionally, broke one of the cardinal rules of anyone who’s in a therapy/coaching/healing profession: Make the person in front of you feel seen and heard.
I brought her my very raw, tender emotions about something that was deeply troubling me, and in her attempt to help, she used an analogy that made me feel very unseen and unheard–and worse than that, almost made me feel gaslit and belittled. Cue rage erupting from me akin to the fires of hell.
But, in classic fashion, my rage gave me an opportunity to coach myself (it turns out, of the two of us I’m probably the better coach for me anyway). And in getting to the bottom of why I was so triggered, I made a HUGE realization:
I was angry because she had treated one of my needs as if it was a want. So, I decided we definitely need to have a Side Chat about this! Listen in as Kristen and I talk about…
- The analogy she used that made me feel like she was diminishing my needs.
- How, in an attempt to be evolved, we often end up gaslighting ourselves out of having needs.
- Why treating needs as needs, rather than wants, makes room for you to have ALL the uncomfortable emotions, without feeling guilty about it.
- Why it’s totally normal to be attached to your needs, and how you definitely don’t have to worry that being attached will mess up your ability to receive what you want.
After you listen, leave a comment below to share something you’ve been treating as a want, that might actually be a need!
We’ve got a LOT happening in our Patreon community this month! Join our $6/month “Flame” tier for access to…
Monthly community meetups on Zoom. Our next one is happening on Sunday, April 25 from 2:00-3:30pm EST. And we’re bringing on an expert for you! Fellow community member Francisca will guide us into expanding and exploring our breath with a 90-minute Conscious Connection breathwork practice to clear energy and release tension.
Here’s a teaser: “Conscious Connected Breathing is a powerful, active three-part breathing practice that consists of a large inhale into the diaphragm, another inhale into the chest, and a soft exhale. This amazing practice has helped people experience more joy, less stress, reduced tension, increased focus, relief, clarity, and connection to their intuition.”
This meetup will be 90 minutes so that we have plenty of space for breathwork and social connection, before and after the main event.
Quarterly Zooms with Krachel! Our first one is happening on Wednesday, May 12 at 1pm EST. Unlike community meetups, this will be recorded. So, if you’re a Flame tier member, you can enjoy the replay if you aren’t able to attend live! More to come on this one closer to the day of, though we’re planning on doing an “ask us anything” themed session for our inaugural event!
Our private Discord Server, which is a space for our community to chat every day and connect! Sharing our feelings, recommending books and podcasts, talking about career and life challenges–it’s all happening on Discord.