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Raise your hand if you’ve ever been a couch potato who decided the best way to motivate yourself was to go all out: signing up for a marathon, weightlifting every day, or going to yoga 6 times a week.
Or maybe you decided it was time to clean up your diet, so you cut all sugar AND dairy AND wheat AND meat.
Or perhaps you wanted to get clear on your career direction, so you bought ten self-help books and signed up for four courses in the space of a month.
The obsession with “all or nothing” is REAL. And a lot of us are caught in a never-ending cycle of swinging from one end of the pendulum to the next, without feeling like we’re making any real progress (and driving ourselves crazy, to boot).
In this month’s interview with an expert, we had a conversation with our friend and fellow coach Amy Everhart, who has lifelong experience with this pattern and is still a work in progress herself. We talked about:
- Where the “all or nothing” mentality comes from (we have multiple theories!).
- When it’s actually OK — and when it isn’t — to be an extremist in your behavior.
- Why living in the grey area between “all or nothing” is usually FAR more productive and likely to get you where you want to go.
- How Amy is breaking free of this pattern, and her insights for you about how to do the same.
After you’ve listened leave a comment below to let us know how this conversation resonated with you!
DO YOU HAVE “ALL OR NOTHING” WHIPLASH?
If you’ve been swinging from one end of the “all or nothing” pendulum to the other without getting anywhere, it’s likely because it’s very difficult to modulate your own behavior. How do you know when you’re doing enough, or too much, or not enough? And how do you know if you’re even taking the right action in the first place?
That’s the point of 1-on-1 coaching: You don’t have to figure any of that out for yourself. Instead, you get to work with someone who understands how to lead you through the process of getting clear on who you are and what you want in the right time, in the right away. It’s a huge relief.
It’s a great time to chat with us about coaching, so reach out here if you’re ready!
MORE ABOUT AMY
Amy Everhart is a women’s leadership coach, business midwife, and feminist troublemaker. Basically, she works with creative, passionate women in the start-up phase of their businesses to lay a strong strategic and energetic foundation for success. She’s the author of the Creative Business Plan Workbook, a free tutorial in her inspiring and no-nonsense resource library. When she’s not talking about business and consciousness, she’s plotting to overthrow the patriarchy and dancing (badly) to Rupaul songs.
Find her online at Amy Everhart Coaching, and follow her on Instagram @amyecoaching.
Leave us a comment on this episode
How to work like a woman (in a world that doesn’t want you to)
Rachel’s blog about ‘all’ not being a remedy for ‘nothing’
Kristen’s blog about why you need to stop fighting life and just go with it
This episode is fantastic. It really made me laugh out loud as I reflected on my last couple weeks. I was a mess, super depressed, and just over it. I looked over what had been happening and realized I really just needed some sleep and sure enough, I got some rest and felt so much better. I am also an all-or-nothing personality and have been working on that. I have such a huge desire to be great at whatever I do that I go gung-ho into things and once I realize I won’t be the best at it, or as soon as I screw up, I quit. I am definitely a work in progress as well, living on the mantra- “all or something, not all or nothing.” I’m trying to just focus on the day ahead of me instead of tomorrow- one day at a time. Thank you for this podcast. So good.
I also hadn’t been getting a lot of sleep last week, and then once I had a few good nights of rest, I felt SO much better! Amazing what the basics can do for us. 😉 I like the “all or something” approach, though after this episode I’d probably change it to “just something,” since that’s probably most likely to get us where we want to go! I’m glad this resonated with you. 🙂