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A few weeks ago, one of Rachel’s clients shared a very interesting conundrum:
She was wading through the world of dating apps, which is a masterclass in practicing discernment and listening to your intuition, as many of you know!
She said, “I’ve gotten pretty good at identifying red flags right off the bat. And I’m also seeing some green flags — signs someone is respectful and shares the same values as me. But I’m struggling at identifying yellow flags. What do I do when I run into something that, in the moment, doesn’t feel like a red flag, but in hindsight, maybe it was? Was I ignoring my intuition? Should I have known better?”
This deserves a whole episode, if you ask us! So, in this month’s brand-new Side Chat we’re diving into how to spot the differences between red, green, and yellow flags.
We got into…
- Why red and green flags have more in common than yellow flags, and why the approach when encountering a yellow flag is so different.
- How to define what counts as a red, green, or yellow flag — some are universal, and some might be very personal to you!
- Recognizing which pattern you default to: Are you someone who paints yellow flags green (aka Kristen)? Or do you default to painting yellow flags red (aka Rachel)?
Leave a comment below after you’ve listened to share which kind of flags you’ve been struggling with. We’d also love to hear how you tend to default when grappling with the tricky yellow ones!
LISTEN TO THESE EPISODES NEXT
Side Chat: Honing your intuition (& knowing when it’s really fear) (June 2019)
Side Chat: Why dating & job searching are the same thing (March 2020)
Side Chat: What happens when your intuition is wrong? (July 2020)
Another fantastic episode! I’m notorious for painting yellow flags green—or even angry, monstrous red ones. I signed up for Caroline McGraw’s email list after I heard Rachel talk in a webinar she did. I can’t wait for her book, and I’m excited to hear what new stuff you have in store, too!
Ooh we can’t wait for you to hear next week’s episode with Caroline, Cassie! You’re going to love her book!
Yay! I love when I inspire a Clarity on Fire podcast episode 😉 I also feel like I just got given a gold star in Life Coaching by being praised by you and Kristen for my yellow flag response 😀
Yes, a big fat gold star for you! I was about to tell you that you inspired this episode, but you beat me there. 😉
All good! Being in Australia I do have a time advantage – the episodes are uploaded onto your Youtube about half a day before they appear on your website, I figured it’s because when you’re uploading it goes there first but it’s the middle of the night for you but the next day for me – so I am LITERALLY ahead of you 😉 It’s particularly fun when I see a new episode in my Youtube feed!
Ahh that makes sense! I think Apple Podcasts releases them later, but I schedule the YouTube ones to go out at midnight my time! 😉
Recently discovered you wonderful ladies and have been binging (binge-ing, not Chandler-ing) your podcasts. A couple years late to the comments, but what the heck- here it goes.
Got to thinking about how I deal with my yellow flags and **celestial chorus sings, “Aaaahhhhhhhhhhh!”** I had an epiphany.
When I get a yellow flag, most of the time it is because my intuition and logical brain are in conflict. When my intuition is a yes but my logical brain is confused, the yellow usually turns to a green (I chat up an unshaven and ill-dressed man in line at the store and later find out he is my boss’ brother.)
When my intuition is a no but logic brain is on board, that usually turns to red flag (Blockbuster stock is a sound investment.)
That’s all I have for the moment. Keep an eye out for more brain dumps from Jane.
Btw- y’all are great.
Love this analysis, Jane! So glad you found us! 🤗